There's never enough time....

There's never enough time to post everything I want to. Geez! Maybe I should wake up earlier instead? Nah! I need my beauty sleep! Let's see - cliffnote version of the past two days. I worked. That's cool. Brenda got a citation for selling smokes to a minor. She's gone! Not yet, but it's just a matter of time! D. is out of the picture now. My checking account is overdrawn by 8.38???? Why? Something is majorly messed up here. G. is a pain in the butt - but he brought a friend home from work today - Jesse. Cute guy - great personality. And yeah - we ended up together. I'm such a slut sometimes! : ) But it was just one of those moments. No regrets allowed! It happened. It was fun! That's the end of it. 'Nuff said! I'm more concerned actually about my checkbook than anything else. I'm selling raffle tickets for the high school band right now. Actually, my niece is supposed to be doing it, but it looks like it's all me (and NuNu, Aunty Tatz. Ken & Pies)... Isn't a family with connections a wonderful thing?

I had a weird dream today - didn't get to bed until after 4:30 PM - and I'm up again to work tonight. I'm so damn dedicated. I don't remember the details, but my bro', Greg was there. Ans something about shipping beer and beef jerky to the Ooompa Loompas? Maybe a quickie before bed isn't necessarily a good thing after all. I just wish i could remember more of the details... and had the time to write them down. I used to keep a notebook by my bed - I need to do so again - just for these strange dreams and moments.

Time to go to work - it's Friday night - so that means "fun, fun, fun!" Yeah - sure it does! Back in the AM (if I still have internet service - that is!) My payment was due today and I forgot! I'll do it in the AM. Wish me luck!

Till the next time!
-Doug

No Time For Tears

No time for tears / star's don't have time to cry
no time for tears / he's just another guy
who used your heart / but don't forget who you are
just playing the part / another movie star

your soul aches / you think it's the end of it all
but tears always dry / and all of us lie
that's all
yeah tears always dry / and all of us lie sometimes
yeah - sometimes

"No Time For Tears" - by Alice Cooper

I was in a good mood. D. just came by. And it all came crashing down. Life really sucks sometimes! Damn - I have to go to work. Until tomorrow then...
-Doug

P.S. - No - it's not as bad as it sounds. I'm just being overly dramatic. But my plans for tomorrow are ruined. I guess I'll just have to make due. Damn! I hate it when that happens...lol.

Rolling Stones Gather No Moss - they just rock!

It's Tuesday night and I'm getting ready for work. Back on 3rd tonite. It should be slow though. I worked 2nd last night - and it was so boring. I did see a few old friends - and I saw one of the guys that I talked about in my last post as well. He didn't know I'd be working that shift - and didn't see me until he came to the register. Talk about embarrassed. LMAO! But I assured him that I hadn't told anyone and it was OK. He made excuses about being drunk and caught up in the moment, etc.. I told him not to worry about it - and he left, but I did yell at him on the way to out to tell his friend, "What up?" for me. He turned red again, smiled and scurried out the door.

Yeah - I know I'm an ass sometimes, but I have to have fun when I can.

Got another edition of "Six Minutes" finished and posted today. It should be up at www.wrestle-zone.co.uk before long. Right now, the plans for the Wrestling HQ website are to have it up and running hopefully by Saturday, October 1... I've been working on TV and PPV archives and wrestler stats. So far, so good. I hope we can get this bad mama-jama up and going on time.

My brother was here around the homestead all day. Steve is 10 years older than me and an ass. He's also a bad drunk and he was reeking of cheap beer. I really don't like being around him that much.. and especially when he's lit like he was. My niece, "the demon spawn" came over after school and we did some match homework. What fun! But I think Steve kind of freaked her out. I used to drink, but I tried not to drink much around the kids because I didn't want them exposed to such B.S. Trust my "beloved brother" to do the opposite. And Morgan, my niece, came by to pick up Dalian. Steve made some kind of sick comment - that luckily, I don't think Morgan heard - or if she did, she didn't acknowledge. Smart girl. Steve may be my brother, but he just makes me sick sometimes. I hate to admit that we're even related.

The relationship with D. is still up and down - we're talking every day for a few minutes here and there, and I had him run me down to Mickey D's a couple of nights ago - which was cool. But it's not what it was. I told him about the guys in the store and he made a sick comment about 'fags"... Hey, wait a second. I don't think he can talk anymore..lol. He quickly caught himself and apologized, but the damage was done. Yeah - I think the fire is going fast.

Pa has finally gotten the message - or so it seems. He's been by the store several times with his hoodlum friends while I'm working, but he doesn't even come in anymore, or if he does, it's just a
"What up with ya?" and that's all. I won't give into him on anything anymore - and he just doesn't like it. Good riddance to him.

Pam and Angel (from work) have agreed to be witnesses for me and my DWI hearing. Tian is acting reluctant, but I'll ask her again tomorrow and she'll probably do it. And then the mother-figure can round it out as my alternate and I'll get this bad mama-jama mailed off. I hope this works - I'd hate to think I've been behaving myself for so long and its to no avail. Well. I don't drink anymore and I sure as hell don't drive - so this should all work out for me. I sure hope so.

I guess that's enough of this for one night. Time to finish getting ready for work - plus I may type up a few more wrestler stats before I go too. Only about 40 pages to go. Oh vey! *sighs*

Until the next time, be good to everyone - and rock on!
-Doug

Only On 3rd Shift...

Last night at work - pure craziness. I've often wondered why I keep working such a dangerous job as 3rd shift cashier in a convenient store when I could easily go work at Wal-Mark or a grocery store and be in a safer, more controlled enviroment. Now I understand why. Because only on the late shift in a c-store can you see anything and everything. I thought I'd seen it all. Well last night topped it.

Thursday night isn't very busy. The first hour is pretty much insane and after about 12:30 - it's steady but nothing major. Well last night, while I was doing my thing, ringing up customers and making small talk and all that - saw a lot of familiar faces, but that's for later....lol. A couple of guys came in - two white guys, probably in their late teens or early 20's. I've seen them in the store before and didn't think too much of it. They bought a couple of drinks and a pack of smokes and went to sit down in the booths.

Here's how the store is layed out. You walk in the front doors and you have the booths on the right. Then the register area and counter. The store expands out to the left. If you go to the booths, you can go around to a little cubbyhole behind the register area. This is where we store excess 12 packs of drinks, empty totes, etc. It's pretty much the only blind spot in the entire store where a person can be totally hidden aside from the bathrooms and stockroom. This is important.

The guys move to the booths to sit. I'm ringing up customers and doing my work and not paying them much attention. I had a crowd lined up back towards the coolers (midnight rush) so I'm working on getting them out and making sure that no one tries to run out with a 12 pack of beer or something.

I finally get the crowd out and look over to the booths and no one is there. No problem. They may have snuck out while I was busy. But the drinks and cigs are still there. I walk around to the booths to clear off the tables and happen to glance around in the cubby-hole area. One of the guys is standing there with his back to the booths/me. His friend is on his knees in front of him, knelt down - giving him a blowjob. Yep! In my damn store. While we're open. And customers are drifting in and out. I kind of loudly said, "what the f***?".. and the guy on his knees jumped up, embarassed. The one who was recieving kind of jolted back to reality and was trying to tuck himself back in.. and having a great deal of problems doing so. He just started apologizing and his friend was apologizing and it was just a totally messed up and awkward situation. I just kind of shook my head and told them that they needed to go somewhere else for that shit. They just kind of shuffled out, grabbing their cigs and drinks on the way out and quickly left. I just started laughing and shaking my head as I headed back up to the front to wait on some customers. I've caught people having sex in the restroom before... and having sex in the parking lot or behind the store before, but NEVER in the store itself... just a few feet out of sight of the customers. Man, they were ready and desperate.

And I have to admit, it was kind of sexy too. They are two great looking guys - real polite and nice .. and very straight acting. I would never have suspected anything with those two. I doubt I'll be seeing either of those two in the store again. Man, they have to be embarassed. Hell, I'm embarassed for them. I'm just glad it was me working and not Brenda or Angel or else they'd be in jail right now.

Man, I love 3rd shift sometimes. It's killing me, but it's times like these that i wouldn't trade for anything.

Time to go to work. Until the next time...

Happy Birthday Tatitia......

-Doug

Catch up time...

So much for keeping this bad mama-jama updated daily. Where to begin? I'm "unretired" as a wretling columnist again. "TS" is still on the shelf, but I resurrected "Six Minutes", my other column for WZ-UK and The Wrestling HQ. And the Wrestling HQ is coming back to life. Even as we speak, Jen is working on it. Let the party begin.

As for me, my life has been the usual craziness mixed with lots of BS and what the...? moments. I think my relationship/ friendship with D has pretty much died down. He never writes - he never calls. I call him or go up to his house, he acts anxious like he's in a hurry to leave. Oh well. It happens, I guess. I've tried to maintain a friendship, but I can feel him pulling away. So I'll just back off and if he comes back, cool. And if not, well, thanks for the memories.

Talked to Brent (finally) last week. I miss that guy something fierce. He's (finally) moving back to NC after the first of the year. So then, he'll be about 3 hours away instead of 13-14....

I went and had my DWI assessment the other day as my quest for getting my drivers license back continues. It went very well and I think I stand a big chance of getting them back this time around. Hell, I don't drink anymore *coughbullshitcough* and I certainly don't drink & drive. It'd be nice to actually be able to get into a car and ride to Wal-Mart or to the store without having to be paranoid. He gave me some pointers that made very good sense.. and I'm playing it pretty close to the vest and doing this right. No screw ups allowed. Wish me luck.

I've got about 3 weeks until my HS reunion - the big 20th.. I'm still undecided if I'm going or not. I've already payed for it, so I guess I should stop by for a little bit if nothing else. But I keep asking myself, I din't much like these people twenty years ago when I went to school with them. why do I think I'll like them now? But I've changed alot.. as have most of my former classmates, I'm sure.

Time for me to get ready for work. I do 3rd tonight and tomorrow and have Sat. and Sunday off. What fun! I'll have a new "6M" up on Saturday.. and the fantasy wrestling thingee is going great as well. The family thingee is this weekend as well.

Happy Birthday, J. Paige.

Until the next time....

Boy, that didn't last long..

So much to talk about. I did an earlier post yesterday, but my computer was acting funny and went all blooey when I tried to post it - so it didn't take. I don't feel like repeating everything again, so I'll go for the cliffnote version of the past week.

Did the family thing on Sunday. Had fun. The nephew is a walking monster and easily whipped my ass while we were wrestling. I can't wait to get him in the ring. Talked to Carlton? Who? Found out where Alex is - an old friend from long ago. Got his phone # again and update on his situation. I want to call, but I don't. Tried to call Greg to no avail. Did manage to call Brent. I miss that boy something fierce. The movie is finished and looking for distributors. He's hard at work on "Hairballs" and looking for $$$. I've hung out with D. a couple of times - but the magic is fading fast. I think we're both ready to move on to other things. Hung out with G. and H. on Monday. The same old crap as always. They want to move and want me to move in with them. All together now: "Bwahahahahahaha!" Yeah! That would really work! I told them I'd "think about it!" Geez!

And that brings me to here and now. Getting ready to go to work. Ma leaves tomorrow for Ohio and her 50th class reunion. That leaves just me and the dog & cat here for the weekend. And of course, I have to work every night (3rd shift) - they're killing me. But it should be kind of fun too!

Sunday night is the wrestling PPV - "Unforgiven"... I'll go out to Tatz's to see that and then it's to work and then home to be off on Monday and Tuesday. Speaking of wrestling - the retirement is fixing to end. I lasted what - almost 8 days? Jen has the Wrestling HQ ready to go again. That means she needs news reporters, columnists, and show recappers. And who's the most qualified person she knows with the most experience at all three? My God, man! That sounds like... me! So it's back to the grind with a new fire and energy. This should be fun! Just like Jason & Freddy, I'm baaaaccckkk!

Ma leaves tomorrow in the AM after I get home from work. I have a lunch date with Tatz around 2:30 or so for Chinese.. and I'm going to try to get up with Pa tonight and have him come by for a few hours tomorrow afternoon so we can finally work out our differences without interuptions. He can't come here when Ma' s around - she hates him... but with her in Ohio, we will have a few hours to actually relax and talk and find out where things actually stand.

Or I may just enjoy the peace and quiet of having the house to myself for a few days. I can just sit around in my boxers and watch movies and relax. LMAO! Who knows?

Back to the wrestling stuff. "Tossing Salt" will stay retired. But "Six Minutes" (my back-up column) will rule the wrestling internet. 'Nuff said! (Insert maniacial laugh here!)

And I guess that's all for now. Expect the updates to be more frequent in the days and weeks to come. (Yeah - I always keep saying that!) And check out the best damn wrestling site on the internet today, coming back soon - www.thewrestlingheadquarters.com.

And that's all folks! Until the next time, see ya!
-Doug

Never Forget!

I've got so much to talk about - the "retirement", my adventures with the family, an update on D. and G.--- and so much more. Plus news on Alex. Who's he? You'll find out! But I've only got about five minutes before I have to leave for work. That's not good! So expect a long update on my soap-opera life tomorrow AM.

As for now - today was 9/11... For all the people who lost their lives in the attacks... and to all the people who are currently suffering as a result of Katrina... you're in the prayers and thoughts forever. You'll not be forgotten!

Gotta go - back tomorrow morning!
See ya!
-Doug

Zzzzzzzzzz!

My first day as a former wrestling columnist. I got home from work, read a while... and slept... all day long. Whassup with dat? I got up for a while to talk on the phone to D. and answer a few e-mails. Lookie! Mail! I got a book about the life of comic/former Hollywood Square Paul Lynde - and started reading that. And then went back to bed again. And now I'm up...and ready for work. It felt good to just relax for one day with no worries and no responsibilities. I guess, tomorrow - after I get off work, it's back to reality. The yard needs to be mowed, laundry needs to be done and I have some phone calls to make. Oh well, it was nice. No sign of Pa again for a few days. I figured he'd be around last night since he knows I got paid yesterday. Maybe he's finally taken the hint. Oh wait - I'm talking about Pa. More than likely, he's been locked up or something. Otherwise, I'll see him tonight or tomorrow night - sometime this weekend. Believe that! I guess that's enough for now. I'll ramble more when I have more time - probably tomorrow morning as I procrastinate mowing the grass. I hate yardwork...lol. Time now to go to work. It's Friday! What fun! : (
-Doug

Retirement - Ooh, what a thrill!

Well, I finally did it. The 150th (and final) edition of "Tossing Salt" is in the books. I kept putting it off and putting it off - but no more. It wasn't the best edition I've ever written, but it wasn't too bad. Now, I'm just a fan again. Time for some rest and relaxation... it's about damn time!

I should be out mowing the grass today, but I realy don't feel like it. Today is the day we have Dalian (the "Demon Spawn") for a few hours - and it's also payday. That means a trip to RAC to pay my computer payment.. and I think that's it. Ma gets the rest.. and I keep $65 for my DWI assessment so I can get my license back.

Look for more updates soon. I've been way slacko as of late, but that ends today. It's a new beginning. Let the good times roll.

Later gator!
-Doug

When In Rome...

It's been a few days and I figure it's time to update things a bit! Where to begin, I just don't know!

I found out where BJ is. County jail. He went before a judge that Friday morning after i last saw him - and told him to fuck himself and he's gonna kill 'em all. Showed his ass bad in court, and got locked up for 90 days! Oh well! That mouth is gonna be his downfall... and this is just another example!

Talked to Pa last night! Damn! I still care so freakin' much about the guy, but he's such a major pile of shit! He said he was hungry, so I bought him food! (Funny how he's got money to drink with and buy grass, but not food!) And of course, he threw out the same lines - the same empty promises that he always does! And like I stupid sap, I acted like I believed him and went along with his BS. He ate - then left! And I didn't even get a hug, a kiss, a "thank you", or anything! Just a "see you tomorrow" and wave of the hand!

Hell, I'm feeling sorry for myself right now! Between my long-term ex (Chris) and Pa - my heart is torn between two pieces of trash who only care about themselves and what they can get out of everyone! I'd be better off just giving in and start sleeping with G. across the street. But then again, he's no different either. Just another back-stabbing, lying piece of trash! Where are all the good men at these days? And I wonder if any of them would like a midd-aged, overweight, sincere, but deeply fucked in the head man to be with! I'm so fuckin' tired of being alone so much!

But then again, I'm not alone! I have D. But he's just another example of someone wanting to have their cake and eat it too. He's dating a girl and claims to be straight - but he keeps coming around here and trying to initiate a little hoopty-hoo all the time! No problem with that - but he's started doing the BS lines - "I love you" and "I want to spend my life with you"... all that crap! If it was true, why would he still be dating that girl? I'm sure he tells her the same thing! And why has he told his parents that he's not hanging with me much anymore? But he's still here everyday! Damn! I hate dealing with a kid...lol. I think I liked it better before we took it past friendship - it was fun and carefree and I felt like I could relax and just be myself - and not have to be on guard all the time. And now, it's just another BS relationship that got fucked up.

I have all sorts of men in my life. But when it comes down to it, that's all just BS and occasional sex! Fuck that! I want more - I want a relationship that matters - someone i can trust and that trusts me - and someone I can be "just me" and not have to pretend to be anyone or anything else! Is that too damn much to ask? I guess so!

Time for work! Gas at the work-hole has risen to 2.99 per gallon - and all the cigs in the store went up 30 cents a pack today! And I've had no sleep (actually about 2 hours all day - I had baby-sitting duty with the demon spawn today!) - so it should be a fun night! I'm tired and everyone is going to be ill! What fun!

I picked a hell of a week to give up drinking and drugs....lol. Just kidding! Time for work! Later people!
-Doug